Well, I have an excuse to blog right now. It's 5am and I am awake... just like every other night this week.
For the past week and a half I have woken up every night around 4ish. I have no idea why my sleep cycle would be off, so it's really frustrating. Tonight I woke up at 3:30, but I was actually able to roll over and fall back asleep, only to be discouraged by waking up again at 4:45. Even worse is the fact that I am going camping this weekend, so I may be tired the entire time.
I suppose I should write about something else though. Thanks to my mother in law, I've been trying to do a lot less griping. :)
So church has been anything but challenging lately. We've been in the desert for quite some time now. The desert being those times in your life when you don't feel/see God moving the way that He used to. Not to say that He's not moving, but regardless, it's not impacting my life the way it did before. Ricky and I are trying to compensate by reading the Word and praying together every night (which I have really enjoyed), but I have just really been searching for that "challenge." Something to make me think, and question, and build my faith. I want to go so much deeper in understanding, and not just be that Christian who accepts everything that's told to me without question.
When someone who does not believe in Christ throws an argument at me, I not only want to be able to defend myself, but I also want to completely blow them away and shred their argument to peices. Sound vicious? We're going to have to be if we want to see God change people's lives... in a godly way of course. :) I'm sure that anyone reading this blog knows that most will no longer accept a well thought out argument for Christianity. No one can be wrong anymore. They will accept our beliefs and "respect" them, but whether Christianity makes sense or not means nothing if there is work involved on their part.
In response to this, I bought a book called "Atheism: The Case Against God," and older book written for college students I think. I know it will be a challenge just to read. It will be written by someone who hates (i.e. "does not believe in") God. I chose this on purpose in order to really understand where these thoughts come from, rather than buying a book that addresses it from a Christian perspective. A Christian book would just water it down. This book will state the argument as if the fact has been proven that God does not exist, and that is what will prepare me for battle in the real world.
Just coming out of my Christian bubble has been world shaking, but come to find out, my bubble is just a teeny tiny portion of the world; a world screaming for life...
... and they don't even know it.